Steve returns to winning ways

This month’s excursion was to the picturesque parkland course, Derllys Court, Banc y Felin. Thanks to the recent spell of dry conditions, the fairways were firm but the greens were still in the process of preparation for the season. Twenty regulars turned out, drawn into four threesomes and two foursomes.

Two starting tees were available, three groups starting from first, and three from the tenth. Leading from the first were Peter Bandit Hughes, Roger Analyst Handcock and Wynne Abacus Richards. All three had a good round with scores of 31, 33 and 29 respectively, setting a target for the team prize at 93. Meanwhile, off from the tenth were Trevor Santa Lewis, Mick Spoonie Hamilton, and Shaun Chatterbox Taylor. Not having played much since having a knee operation, Spoonie failed to set the course alight, managing 21pts. Both Santa and Chatterbox looked set for good scores but with a couple of loose shots, ended with 31 and 32pts. Second threesome off the first were Keith Director Leverton, Anthony Wiseguy Ryan and Barrie Gravel Avery. Wiseguy played well but several slip-ups limited his score to 32pts. His partners missed a few more putts to end with 28 and 29pts, a creditable total of 89pts. The second trio starting on the tenth was John Javelin James, Steve Gizmo Jones and Barry Chippy Wood. Early signs were that some good scores were in the offing, Chippy recording 21pts for the first nine. However, their second nine caused a few problems, the pond on the second swallowed two balls and one dropped in the ninth pond! Gizmo took a practice swing and hit the ball, later he found hit a drive that ended under a tree, his first attempt to chip it out left-handed was an air shot and his second go knocked the ball two foot! Their scores ended at 33 28 and 36 respectively, making a total of 97pts placing them in the lead for the team prize, also a possible individual  trophy. The final group from tee one,  Paul Good Value Marsden, Martin FCUK Davies, Wyn Ballhound Hopkins and Roger Doombar Woodward. A strong combination that did not live up to expectations, Doombar managed 32pts and Ballhound 30pts. FCUK lost the thread at times but still reached 29pts. The fourth member, Good Value did not have much luck, his 21pts putting him in wooden spoon territory. The second foursome teed off from the tenth, John Bookie Williams, Steve Scouser Allen, Tom NHS Woods and Kelvin Blinds Boughey. Two of this group played beyond their handicap, one with 37pts and the other a magnificent 39pts, both will be on a lower handicap for the next meeting! Unfortunately the other two could not reach such heights recording 23 and 25pts cutting their overall total to 93pts. (adjusted to three).

With everyone in the nineteenth, the two course meal was served, a choice of chicken curry or sausage and mash with peas and onion gravy followed by sponge pudding and custard or cheese and biscuits. Finally, time for presentations well conducted by Steve Gizmo Jones.  In first place, Steve Scouser Allen, 39pts, 3 shot cut; second with 37pts, John Bookie Williams, 2 shot cut; in third place with 36pts, Barry Chippy Wood, 1 shot drop. Team prize with 97pts, John Scribe James, Steve Gizmo Jones and Barry Chippy Wood. Over 20 handicap winner was Roger Doombar Woodward with 32pts. Big hitter Paul Good Value Marsden took the prize for the longest drive. Due to the mysterious disappearance of the marker for nearest the pin, no prize could be awarded! Two members vied for the wooden spoon on 21pts, on count-back for six holes the spoon went to Mick Spoonie Hamilton. There were two 2’s, Trevor Santa Lewis and Steve Scouser Allen. Gizmo also thanked Roger Woodward and John Hargrave for their contributions to the prize fund, and Derllys Court for their hospitality and excellent after match meal.